Getting To The Australian, British and USA Embassies From Pattaya. Plus Nana or Pat Phong.

Pattaya Ekamai Bus to Bangkok

This procedure could be applied for any trip to Pat Pohng, Silom Road, Wireless Rd, Sukhumvit Rd, or any location along the north end of Sathorn Road.

The bus service departs Pattaya from Roong Reuang Bus Terminal located at the Sukhumvit end of North Pattaya Road in North Pattaya. The trip takes up to two hours depending on traffic. The last trip I did in August 2007 took one hour and fourty-five minutes to reach On Nut BTS station. I will tell you more about that shortly.

Take the Ekamai bus to Bangkok. The current fare is 113 Baht and 117 baht back. OK OK what's the difference? Another "I will tell you later". TIT

For those who love the early morning starts the first bus departs at 5.30 am then 6.30 then every 20 minutes.

6:50, 7:10, 7:30, 7:50, 8:10, 8:30, 8:50, 9:10 bla bla

Pattaya Bus Departure Time Hint  When the 6.30 bus reaches Bang Nah Bangkok it will sometimes encounter a load of commuter traffic. This is the "iron dragon". It moves at the extraordinary rate of around one foot per minute followed by sudden bursts of ten or twenty feet per minute. Yorky took this route one morning and it took one hour to get from Bang Nah to Ekamai Bus station about 6.2 Klm. With this information in mind it is better to take an earlier or later bus.

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Pattaya Bangkok Bus Seat Allocation

Try to get seat 5, 9, 12, or 17

Avoid seat numbers 27 and 28 on buses that have the toilet in the middle of the bus.

If you sit in either of these seats you will have the chance to breath in the aroma of the rarely cleaned toilet.

Unless you have some weird ass-frying fetish never take seat 41, 42, 43, 44 or 45 they are located right at the back of the bus above the engine and get very hot.

Avoiding The Bang Na Jam

When the bus reaches Bang Na Bangkok it could be moving at a tortoise crawl pace along Sukhumvit Road. To save some time in the traffic get off the bus at On Nut before you get to Ekamai. ( A good relief if your ass is frying and a double time saver if you happen to be on the 6.30am bus)

Getting Off The Bus at On Nut

On Nut is 2.3 KM before Ekamai. This stop is also called LoTUS as LoTUS is right there beside the On Nut station. It would be the Thai penchant to call that stop LoTUS since they are so much into spending most of their free time wandering around the cool SUE PURR! (Pronounced with great emphasis on the last syllable "PURR) Other more practical landmarks go unnoticed.

I once held a post as hotel front desk staff English language trainer, On Fridays, I would ask my class "What are you going to do on the weekend?" There were always two answers:

"Go to the SUE PURR" and

"SLEE PING"

I told the attendant on the bus I wanted to get down at On Nut. "Low TUS eh?" he asked.

I couldn't agree because at that time my knowledge of LoTUS locations in Bangkok was as clear as peering into the canal at BRA TOO NAM during a power outage at 3.00am on a cloudy night. If you don't know what that is like then it's sort of like looking into a dark dog's empty stomach.

Anyway the driver cleared it up by saying. "Eh you can call it On Nut or Low TUS On Nut OK Low TUS OK either is OK. What ever you like. It doesn't matter. Understand?" I think his attendant got the picture.
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Travel on the BTS or Bangkok Skytrain

If you have other places to go on the BTS and you calculate that you will spend more than 120 baht in fares for the day then buy the "One Day Pass" that gives you unlimited rides for the day for, you guessed it, 120 baht.

BTS Bangkok Skytrain Smart Pass

I bought a different card the "Smart Pass" for 100 baht plus a 30 baht card "issuing fee". It can be topped up as it runs out. Minimum top up is 100 baht. I purchased the "Smart Pass" because I was planning to return to Bangkok the following week.
The BTS documentation regarding the "BTS Smart Card" states, "this card has a five year life span from the first day of use." You might like to ponder that. The first day of use bit.

BTS (Skytrain) Loose Change

I also bought the BTS Smart Card to avoid having to buy a hand full of 10 baht coins for the ticket vending machines. If you don't have those heavy bits of shrapnel in your pocket at the time you need them then you will sometimes have to wait in a cue to buy the coins at the station.
Screw that.
You will need eight of those sinkers just for this round trip on the BTS.

Dropping a few on the floor when you've had a few ales is not fun either. If you do happen to be pissed and have the misfortune to be staggering around in front of the vending machines trying to catch your hard earned pieces of copper and silver then make sure you don't stand on one. Let me rephrase that. Don't stand on any. Skip jump or dance around those shinny coppers. I know that might be a difficult call for some flatfooted piss heads but the Thais have great respect for their Royals and standing on the King or Queen's head is a definite NO NO. So go for the card. The worst you can do is slip over on it, crack your head and land in the Bangkok Pattaya Hospital.

BTS Bangkok Skytrain Smart Pass Really is Smart

Jokes aside another cool feature of this plastic representation of money and time is you don't have to shove it into the slot in the BTS turnstile machine then wait for it to appear out of some other slot.

Previously I used to keep walking when the machine swallowed my ticket and forget to grab it after the machine spat it out of the second slot.

It's kind of like I don't mind feeding the baby but I don't like wiping it's ass.

The new BTS Smart Pass plastic card ticket (the size of a credit card) stays in your hand. You just wave your Smart Pass over a disk on top of the old machine, the gate opens and you keep walking. Don't be waving your credit card at it. It won't work.

Australian Embassy, Pat Phong or Silom

Take the sky train from On Nut to Sala Daeng. Cost 40baht.
When you are traveling from On Nut or Ekamai you will need to change trains at Siam Central. Just get off and go down to the next level. The stations are well sign posted with signs in English. The Thai authorities know where the dollars are and make it as convenient as possible to spend them.

When you get out of the train at Sala Daeng station go down to the next level.

Stand facing the same direction your train was going (if you can remember) and go down the last stairs on your left.

If you are going to Pat Phong, Silom you are already there but take the last stairs on your right to land you at the opposite side of the street.

Continuing to Australian Embassy.

After going down the last stairs on your left walk to the next Soi called Convent Road. (For orientation you are walking away from Rama 4). You might like to take a few minutes to absorb the refreshing scene at this quaint tree lined avenue (Convent Road) before jumping on a motorbike taxi.

To find a motorbike taxi you will need to walk into Soi Convent about ten meters. The sidewalk will be typically cluttered with vendors, tables and chairs. You will probably notice some pretty damsels jumping onto motorbike taxis at the curb.

You will not see the usual group of motorbike taxi boys waiting on this side of the road but they are watching from a distance and will come to pick you up. Just stand behind one of those pretty ladies if you are there between 8.00 am and 9.00 am. Take the motorbike taxi to the Australian Embassy.

It is not far and your ride will be like a scary ride in an amusement park. Fare cost is 20 Baht so take advantage of this cheap thrill. You would pay at least 300 baht for a thrill ride like this in your own country.

If you don't know how to negotiate a fare with a motorbike taxi driver then you probably haven't been here long or haven't read the section on motorbike taxis. Read it now, it will save you aggravation and money. It could even save your life.

Tip: If you ask the BTS station staff which station to get off for Sathorn Road they will tell you Surasak. Sure that's Sathorn Road but too far south. It will be a 3.2KM 40 baht motorbike taxi ride to the embassy. Sala Daeng station is just a 1 KM motorbike taxi ride to Australian Embassy.

If you miss Sala Daeng then the next stop Chong Nonsri is a 1.2 KM motorbike taxi ride to Australian Embassy. If you are energetic the walk from Sala Daeng station is less distance than the motorbike route. The total walking distance is around 850 meters.

Hint: If you are going to the embassy to apply for a new passport you will need two passport photos. Some photographic shops are not familiar with the embassy's required photo specification.

To avoid disappointment get your passport photos taken at the Kodak shop just inside the "Ban Yan Tree Hotel" building on the ground floor. It is on Sathorn Road about 170 meters from the Oz embassy.

They are efficient and know the exact photo specifications. They will produce 5 perfect passport photos for 150 baht total. The motorbike taxi boys at Sala Daeng station know this building. If you are walking from Sala Daeng it is 170 meters on past the Oz embassy on the same side of the street.

British Embassy

From Ekamai or On Nut take the BTS sky train to Ploen Chit station.

When you get out of the train at Ploen Chit station go down to the next level.

Stand facing the same direction your train was going (if you can remember) and go down the last stairs on your right. The British Embassy is a 90meter walk from the bottom of the stairs walking in the same direction your train was going.

USA Embassy

From Ekamai or On Nut take the BTS sky train to Ploen Chit station.

When you get out of the train at Ploen Chit station go down to the next level.

Stand facing the same direction your train was going (if you can remember) and go down the last stairs on your left. The USA Embassy is a 806 meter walk from the bottom of the stairs. Traveling in the same direction your train was going walk 80 meters to Wireless Road turn left into Wireless then walk another 726 meters to the Embassy.

If you prefer not to walk then take a motorbike taxi. There will be a few near the station steps or near the corner of Wireless Road and Sukhumvit. The fare should be 20 baht.

Soi Cowboy (Asoke) From Airport

The new Bangkok airport (Suvarnabhumi) is 35 km by road from Soi Cowboy on Asoke Sukhumvit. Suvarnabhumi is pronounced "Sue-Wana-Poom" and means "The Golden Land".

The time taken to travel that distance will vary depending on the traffic. The density of traffic will vary depending on the time of day that you travel. The high-density periods are from 7:30 a.m. till 9:30 a.m. and from 4:00 p.m. until 8:30 p.m. Usually the trip takes around 35 minutes if executed during the low traffic periods.

If you travel during the high traffic period then you should expect the duration of your journey to be more. It could double. Please be warned that a traffic jam can occur at any time of the day or night along Sukhumvit Road. This often happens on the 6 km stretch of road between On Nut Road and Asoke. At those times the traffic has been known to move at around one meter per minute. This is commonly known as the "Iron Dragon".

Last year a friend reported that it took around 40 minutes just to travel from Bang Na Sukhumvit to Ekamai bus station about 7 KM. There is a workaround for this.

Taxi Skytrain Traffic Workaround

When your taxi reaches Bang Na Bangkok the traffic could be moving at a tortoise crawl pace along Sukhumvit Road. To save some time in the traffic get off the taxi at On Nut station on Sukhumvit. Of course you should attempt this only if you are travelling light say with just one bag or backpack..

On Nut is 6 Km before Asoke station. The On Nut station stop is also called LOTUS (Lotus supermarket) as LoTUS is right there beside the On Nut Sky Train station. The Thais also call that stop Lo TUS.

So you could tell your taxi driver you want to go to ROT FAI FAR On Nut (pronounced ON NOOT) or Lo TUS (pronounced LOW TUS with emphasis on the syllable TUS).

ROT FAI FAR is Thai for electric train.

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Sky Train Station Stops & Distance

On Nut (E9) to Phra Kanong (E8) ______ 1.56 KM
Phra Kanong (E8) to Ekamai(E7)______ 0.84 KM
Ekamai (E7) to Thong Lo(E6)_________ 0.87 KM
Thong Lo (E6) to Phrom Pong (E5) ____ 1.22 KM
Phrom Pong (E5) to Asoke (E4) _______1.50 KM

Soi Cowboy is at the Asoke Sky Train station stop.

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